Brain Wreck

In memoriam, Agnes Gertrude “T-Bills” Crockett Rockefeller. Born July 4, 1923, daughter of Davy and Betty Crockett in Latrineville, Tennessee. Died July 4, 2023, in New York, New York. Famously memorialized in “The Ballad of Aggie Crockett” as recorded by Puss Farker and the Sex Pistols.
“She was born on a mountaintop in Tennessee
Where she was introduced to violence and greed
Killed her a b’ar when she was only three
Killed her whole family when she was only four.
Psycho…psycho Aggie
Waddled off with the family cash.”

Our beloved grandmother, Aggie “T-Bills” Rockefeller, went to heaven while celebrating her 100th birthday. She was preceded in death by her husband of 4 years and 3 months, Winthrop P. Rockefeller, with whom she was united in holy matrimony at either a Southern Baptist or Pentecostal church somewhere around Toadsuck, Arkansas, in some year unknown to the family. She was also preceded in death by 6 children who are all listed in “Who’s Who in America and Arkansas”. She is survived by the numerous grandchildren who paid for this obituary and The Rockefeller Foundation Trust. Goodbye Grandma. Thanks for everything.