Category: Short story
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March Madness Sadness
With the current frenzy of March Madness basketball, the most memorable game in tournament history, the story of which the NCAA has tried desperately to suppress for many years, is now the source of a new documentary called “Dumfungelmania” brought to you by the Dumfungel Corporation of downtown Scotland. The story begins in a small…
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A Dumfungle Family Reunion
The American Dumfungle family reunion was recently held at cousin Ted Dumfungle’s farm located just outside of Monkey’s Eyebrow, Kentucky. And yes, that is an actual place. Cousin Ted’s place has proven to be the perfect hideout for our clan, and if you have read previous posts on this site, you’ll know why we need…
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Mt. Everest Shangri-La Condo Development Seeks Investors
Have you ever dreamed of a place far away from it all where you can view some of the world’s most fantastic scenery while sitting in a cool evening breeze and watching the little ant people far below wading in hot rising ocean water and suffering in the god-awful heat brought on by the “hoax”…
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Yes Virginia, There Will Be Automated Phone Systems in Hell
This post is taken from an actual recording of my most recent experience with the cheap bastards who have unleashed these exasperating automated phone systems on the general public. I assure you that this is completely verbatim. You know by now that I would never lie to you. Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring….ad infinitum.…
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Moose Crap Pie by Boris and Natasha
I am Boris. She is Natasha. You know us from KGB. Also, you know us from stupid show about stupid moose and stupid squirrel. Stupid moose with IQ of one finger and stupid flying squirrel who could only fly with wires like Peters Pan Tinkerbell boy. Bullwinkle Moose and Rocket J. Squirrel (J. for Wendell)…
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Gene Autry and Roy Rogers Present
After me and Roy quit makin’ movies, we didn’t do much of nothin’ besides sit around scratchin’, drinkin’ beer, and playin’ pinochle with Pat Brady and Gabby Hayes and Smiley Burnette. Hayes was okay ’cause he didn’t talk too much. His vocabulary was pretty much limited to the occasional “by cracky,” or “jumpin’ jehosophat,” or…
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Nugent and Cruz at the Cancún Burger King
I usually don’t do interviews with controversial people, but I couldn’t resist the chance to witness what happens when massive overdoses of testosterone get swirled around in a vacuum. My investigative journalist curiosity was aroused. In the interest of complete transparency, a term which I have grown to loathe, I must tell you that I…
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Easter Rabbit by Idi Amin DaDa
When I am child in village, Mama DaDa and Dada DaDa buy brothers, sisters, buy me too some Easter candy, Easter basket, Easter chick, Easter rabbit. We all dress up then take picture. After dress up, Idi Amin eat Easter candy, eat Easter basket, eat brother and sister Easter candy, eat brother and sister Easter…
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A Frank Sinatra Christmas
The millions of you who faithfully follow this blog, (ahem), should by now be familiar with my neighbor, Madame Tammy Dawn. She is the person who conducts all the seances that put me in touch with famous deceased people who wish to be guest bloggers. Tammy Dawn is also the neighborhood taste-tester for various brands…
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Mr. Ed Soup by Wilbur
Hi, I’m Wilbur. You all remember me from my starring role in the immortal TV series, ‘Mr. Ed’, and also from my work at the Peoria Playhouse, my numerous starring roles with the Akron Little Theatre, and my long-running commercial for ConstiPoodle, the laxative for doggies on the go. Of course, my most famous role…
Brain Wreck 