Brain Wreck

Tarzan hungry. Jane hungry. Thanksgiving come. Jane go shop Piggly Wiggly Nairobi. Take canoe. Two day down. Eight day back. Fast river. Jane no buy frozen. Jane slow paddle. Too much sightsee.

Boy go Las Vegas. Texas Hold ‘Em International Championship. Last year boy drink too much. Lose big time. This year six month AA meeting. Boy say ready. Boy no win, boy no come back. Boy no win, bank repo Tarzan treehouse. Bad bank.

Cheetah bug Tarzan. Tarzan sad. Tarzan lonely. Tarzan hungry. Cheetah say, “Whatsa’ matter big boy? Hot mama run off and leave you? It’s no wonder. It would seem that you are not overly familiar with the concept of personal hygiene. Maybe that’s why they both left. You really should look into that. Ah, and what’s that you say? You’re broke beyond broke? Hey, here’s an idea. Why don’t you just get a job like a normal ape man? Oh yeah, your only job skills are swingin’ on grapevines and calling elephants without a cell phone. Huge demand for that, big boy. Huge demand!”

Tarzan no like smart-ass monkey. Wise guy monkey ruin Thanksgiving spirit for Tarzan. Cook make Tarzan happy. Tarzan cook. Here recipe Tarzan make. Recipe hand down from Grandma Tarzan.

Grandma Tarzan Thanksgiving Recipe.
Make marinade. Use big crock. Put in vegetable stock, oregano, tarragon, chives, bay leaf, one tsp. salt, one tsp. pepper, one qt. Dr. Livingstone Presumptuous Prune Juice, one qt. Dr. Schweitzer Missionary Position Salad Dressing. Marinate one sun, one moon.
In medium saucepan sauté onion, green pepper, mushroom. Tarzan use extra virgin olive oil. Make Tarzan healthy. Keep Tarzan regular.
Put all in big boiling pot. Add secret monkey ingredient. Leave Tarzan hand outside.
Serve risotto, new potato, pesto, baby snow pea. Tarzan like ice cream. Make ice cream.

Tarzan say Happy Thanksgiving! Jane say Happy Thanksgiving! Boy under arrest for DUI in Las Vegas. Monkey finally shut up.